Thankfuls 2020

 I have been pondering the last few weeks if I can be thankful for seemingly opposite things.  During this season of life, I am thankful when I can take a long hot uninterrupted shower.  It is glorious! The most common reason that I typical do not take long uninterrupted showers is my kids.  But I am so thankful for my kids. I would pick my kiddos over taking a long hot uninterrupted shower ever again.

All of that to say, some of the things that make the list this year may seem like opposites, but I think you can be thankful for both - long hot uninterrupted showers and short interrupted showers. 

*I feel like the longer I am a mom, the more sappy I get, so bear with me - ha!*

1. God - He saved us from a life of slavery into a family of freedom
2. Ian Michael - He listens, encourages, and continues to befriend me.  He is patient with my shortcomings and all my crazy parenting ideas.

3. Samuel Cary - you bring a smile to my heart everyday. I love playing with you and seeing your imagination and new ideas.

4. Henry Joseph - your smile is infectious, your laugh is contagious, and your snuggles are endearing (and your appetite is astounding)

5. Our Girl - next year (Lord willing) we will know you

     5.1 Baby Kicks and Squirms

     5.2 the sweet way the boys already love our little lady

6. Monroe - I didn't know I could love another like my own until there was you

   I am trying to crank this whole list out during naptime so I need to just start listing people / things or I will never finish

7. Brody

8. Jared and Hallie

9. Cary and Brandy

10. Dad and Mom /  Papa and Gaga B

11. Daddio and Mommabomma / Papa and Gaga G

12. The rest of our family - how they encourage us with facebook posts, cards in the mail, and fun group text messages

13. Our church family - what a honor and privilege to have them love us (especially our kids) and allow Ian to lead them

14. BSF

       14.1 BSF children's ministry

       14.2 my BSF leader this year - she has done the whole thing over zoom - bless her

15. Chocolate bourbon pecan pie

16. Michigan Cherry Decaf coffee from Meijer 

17. kid books that don't make me lose my mind after reading them 1000 times

18. toys with no batteries or lights or sound

19. long hot uninterrupted showers

       19.1 short interrupted showers

20. our double stroller

21. Ryan - our minivan

22. Redneck Disney

23. large water bottles

24. the magic of going outside

       24.1 having great outdoor space

25. modern appliances - washer, dryer, dishwasher, hot water heater, air conditioner, furnace, microwave, coffee maker, stove / oven, refrigerator, freezer

26. snow plows, snow plow drivers, and salt

27. dual control queen size electric blanket

28. electronic books (is that the right description?) and real books

29. age appropriate kid shows 

30. when I try a new recipe and it tastes good

31. restaurants and take out

32. disposable diapers

33. the Word - how it is living and active

34. our neighbors

35. parks, nature centers, and reservoirs

36. coffee shops and bakeries

37. Costco

38. when both kids take coordinating, longer than usual naps

39. people that I can be 100% myself around 

40. the ability to change

41. marriage experts, parenting toddler experts, baby sleep experts, feeding toddler experts, activities for toddler experts... people who are smarter or more experienced than me and share their knowledge

       41.1 Focus on the Family

42. sunshine-y days

43. how excited the kids are when Dad comes home from work every day

44. when the kids dance

45. when the kids play well together

46. Christmas music

47. healthcare professionals, health insurance, urgent care, and hospitals

48. friends from college, Korea, and Colorado that stay in touch

49. simple things that bring my kids joy - bubbles, outdoor Christmas decorations, chocolate covered pretzels

50. when you find a good deal on something you have wanted

51. Samuel seems to like preschool

52. board games that both Ian and I like

53. how accurately they can predict the weather

54. vacation and times of rest

55. Daniel Tiger and his bajillion little jingles that resonate with my kids

56. Seeds Family Worship

57. space heaters

58. when you think one kid is going to be mean to his sibling and then he does something surprisingly sweet

59. date nights

60. going on walks

      60.1 the hope of running again

61. HOPE

62. peg doll nativities and resurrection sets

63. soaps and candles that smell good

64. crockpots

65. when you get something fun in the mail

66. online grocery order and pickup

67. indoor plumbing

68. the knowledge that I am not the only one who has ever faced __________ (don't believe me?  google it - it is on a parenting forum or blog post somewhere on the internet)

69. Peanut Butter M&Ms

70. instagram

71. comfy maternity clothes

72. good pictures of my kids (shoot even decent pictures of my kids ha!)

73. fun memories

      73.1 good travel adventures

74. friendly dogs and patient cats

75. pretty fall foliage

76. spellcheck

77. traveling

78. when I have control of the thermostat (submitted about me by my amazing husband)

79. things that boost or strengthen our immune systems

80. when your kid wakes up too early from a nap but then goes back to sleep

81. when Ian feels good about his sermon for the week

82. Hobs and Little Bunny (our kids' stuffed animals that are basically family members)

83. our coffee mug collection

84. Chickfila

       84.1 Chickfila ice

85. things that make you belly laugh (or make your kids belly laugh)

86. indestructible toys

87. electricity, natural gas, and gas for cars

88. hand me downs

89. the unchanging attributes of God

90. lists

91. when you successfully kill the fly or insect inside your house or vehicle

92. facial tissue with the lotion in it

93. when a light burns out and you have the right size replacement bulb

94. garbage trucks

95. music (submitted by Ian)

96. cheese (submitted by Ian)

97. pickles (submitted by Henry - just kidding - if he could, he would submit it)

98. the smell of a campfire

99. being done with a project

100. Grandpa Schaudt - I bet he read this list all the way to the end

Christmas 2019

I told Ian earlier today, "This may be the best Christmas of our lives!" and it feels so true.  There were so many good memories that I wanted to capture from today.  (And just in case you are wondering - the Best Christmas Ever was the very first Christmas when God the Son took on flesh - nothing can top that)

I think the reason that this Christmas has seemed so great is that Samuel is old enough to "get it" yet he has no expectations.  It results in a lot of joy.

Leading up to Christmas, people would ask Samuel, "What do you want from Santa?" and he would just stare at them blankly.  This blessed my heart so much! My husband grew up not really believing in Santa and that has been something we have wanted to pass onto our kids. So we talk about Santa but we don't do much more than that.  Samuel also has a speech delay that sometimes impedes his communication - I am sure this played a part as well. At some point Samuel will have a whole list of things that he would like from "Santa" but to have a seemingly content two and a half year old is amazing.  

This morning when we told the boys that it was Christmas, Samuel's first reaction was to run to the other room to see the nativity scene.  My mom wrapped up each piece of the nativity to correspond with The Donkey in the Living Room when they were here over Thanksgiving.  We have been unwrapping a piece each day and trying to talk about the different parts of the Christmas story (that means - Samuel likes to unwrap the piece and then has a 5 second attention span for any reading I try to do).  Total Mom fail - I thought he would be more interested in the presents under the tree that I did not have the next piece out.

Henry hung out in Baby Jail (a toy that holds him in one spot) and Samuel opened presents.  We decided to do Read, Wear, Want gifts this year.  I am sure we will do something different each year.  Henry got some special sock / slippers that weren't supposed to come off.  (Spoiler alert: he had them pulled off in less than a minute).  I didn't wrap Henry's gift as he doesn't really understand.  And if he can see Mom or Dad, he is happy.  

Samuel got a firetruck, the Jesus Storybook Bible, and waterproof mittens from Mom and Dad.  He got a gazillion other gifts from friends and relatives (and he hasn't even gotten some of the grandparent gifts yet).  He was thrilled with his toy firetruck and carried it all over with him.  He did a great job (for a two and half year old) of taking turns with Mom and Dad for opening gifts.  As far as I know, Samuel thought that today was just any other day and then instead, Dad got to stay home and there were presents to open.  There was no countdown to Christmas Day, no "I can't sleep because tomorrow is Christmas", no "waking Mom and Dad up at 5:30 because it is Christmas and I just can't sleep" (Hank covered the wake Mom and Dad up several times during the night thing - his second front tooth on the top is sooooo close to popping through that he was up a few times).

We had waffles for breakfast and Samuel did a lot of good pretend play with his fire truck.  Henry did a lot of peekaboo and "Praise the Lord" (what we say when he puts both arms above his head).  Two happy boys.

While Henry napped, we went outside and enjoyed the gorgeous weather.  Once he woke up, Brent came by with a gazillion gifts!  Oh my goodness - Mr. Potato Head, a police car toy, the Very Hungry Caterpillar game, Bible Word books, kitchen play cooking sets, and soooo much more.

Once he left, we tried to get lunch and kiddos down for naps.  We had a gourmet lunch of "eat whatever you want" (I had a bowl of cereal and Ian had leftover pork).  We try to do some conversation questions at meal times so that we can practice good conversation and not focus so much on what different people are deciding to eat or not eat (the Internet claims that this is supposed to help). Ian asked, "What was your favorite gift from today?"  Samuel (completely unprompted) replied, "Gigi" which is how he says Jesus.  (Did I mention that today has been the best Christmas of our lives!?!)  Such a great answer!  And such a great encouragement that some of the stuff we say does sink in.  We then sang (along with our beloved Alexa) Happy Birthday to Jesus.  And Samuel kept requesting to sing it again (the love of repetition is strong in this one).

The boys (all three of them) are waking up from naps now and we are headed over to hang out with some friends from church.  What a blessing today has been! Merry Christmas!

Samuel Cary - 22 months

What a fun month we have had!  Several people have mentioned, "It seems like he is so grown up" or "He is a little boy now".  I think I have kept waiting for a season of parenting to feel easy or that saying that life with Samuel has been fun implies that it is easy.  I don't know if there is a season of parenting that is easy.  BUT life with Samuel is fun (and sanctifying).  One month from today we start over - Samuel gets a brother.  I am such a sap when I think about it.  So here is a sappy look at our last month.

Accomplishments:
Dada went on a mission trip - We survived a week away from Dada.  I told Ian, "I feel so sorry for whomever stays with Samuel when we are in the hospital with the Baby."  Samuel asked about Dada about 800 times.  Since Ian flew out of Indianapolis, we were able to drive together to the airport, drop him off, and then drive just a few hours to MamaG's (and Samuel napped for an hour of the drive that I had solo!).

The last time we went to Ian's parents, Samuel and I had tummy bugs and then we all got colds.  This time we were healthy - Praise the Lord!  It helped the week to pass quickly as Samuel had new toys to play with, new libraries to explore, and MamaG to play with when she wasn't at work.

Samuel also asked about "Pa" (PapaG) about 800 times. I told him, "Dada and Papa are working together." So I think he now thinks that Ian and Matt work together all the time.  It was fun to get pictures of them and show the pictures to Samuel.  We spent a lot of time looking at pictures on Momma's phone during the week (but we watched no TV... moderation, right?).

Ian's flight got delayed on the way back by 3ish hours.  I decided to just drive all the way home by myself (we were already on the road when we found out about the delay).  Samuel did amazingly well... until the last hour.  Then we were both tired and the sun kept shining in his eyes (and there wasn't a way to block it).  But we made it.  It is fun when you can see growth in your kid.  He did so much (so much!) better in the car than our trip to IL for Thanksgiving.  

On the flip side (what is the opposite of an accomplishment?) we just got back from Presbytery and Lawdhavemercy - Samuel slept horribly.  He napped for 20 minutes and then slept from 7pm-12:30am and 4am-6:30am. So I may never let him sleep outside of his crib ever again.  I always think, "Oh he will get tired, he will sleep" - not my kid - the more tired he is, the worse he sleeps.  I look back and chuckle at my new mom self thinking, "Babies sleep when they are tired."  Nope.  They sleep when you put them on a rigid schedule and follow it.  I could say a lot more about Samuel and sleep, but who wants to hear about that?

Talk on the phone - Samuel has realized that he can "talk" on the phone to people.  He really only wants to talk to Dada and sometimes PapaG, but he asks everyday (sometimes multiple times a day) to call Dada (he puts his hand in a flat palm to his ear and tells me who to call). He likes to hold the phone up to his ear and walk around.  He usually doesn't say much.  I need to get him an old phone from the thrift store (it has been on my mental to do list for about 3 months).

Help make muffins - for Valentine's Day, I tried to think of some things that Samuel loves.  The list was: cracking eggs, stirring stuff in a bowl, blueberries, bubbles, muffins, and watching trucks - so we made blueberry muffins together and then I let him play in the bubbles from the dish soap while watching trucks drive by the kitchen window.  He did such a good job!  I told him to that we had to work together and stir gently.  All the ingredients stayed in the bowl for the most part and he did so well.  He did have a meltdown when the muffins came out of the oven and they were too hot to eat.  A few months ago, he would stir so violently that flour would fly out of the bowl and he was so bullheaded about how things needed to be done that he wouldn't listen.

2T jammies - Samuel is still wearing 18 month clothing but I moved him up to 2T jammies and they seem to fit better.  He has "vroom!  vroom!" jammies in size 2T so you can guess how Samuel feels about moving up in size. Once we finish our stash of size 5 diapers, he will be in size 6.  


Putting mittens on - Samuel has gotten so much better at putting his mittens on over the course of winter.  At the beginning of winter, he basically would shove his whole hand into the big part.  He now knows to put his thumb into the thumb part (sometimes he puts his pointer finger in with his thumb, but he will let me fix it).  He used to wear his mittens for 5 minutes and then take them off.  He wears them the whole time we are outside (or until he soaks them by picking up snow).

A few more sounds - Samuel has created a sound for a cat.  It sounds something like, "yumyum" but it is his "meow".  He saw a figurine of a Souix Indian this month and called it, "Jesus" so instead he learned "how-ow-ow" while tapping his hand over his mouth.  Probably not the most socially acceptable thing.  He has a sound for "owie!" (see dramatic finger story below).

Likes:

Big Boy Anything - At times, Ian or I will mention, "what a big boy bite!" or something along those lines.  Well it has either paid off or backfired.  Samuel is all about big boy anything now.  He has a Big Boy Diaper that he gets to wear at nightime (it is actually a pull up for like 5 year olds but it leaks less often than anything else)  It has Spiderman on it and Samuel is obsessed.  He wants to wear Big Boy diapers for naptime (or anytime really).  I now buy three different types of diapers (my pre-Mom self is rolling her eyes and my current Mom self is muttering, "choose your battles and move on").  There are normal Costco diapers, Big Boy Naptime Diapers (Pampers Sesame Street), and Bedtime Big Boy Diapers (Nitetime Spiderman).  I try to be careful about labeling anything as Big Boy as then Samuel wants to do it the Big Boy way from then on.  

The other day I asked Samuel to carry an apple to the table while I worked on making the rest of his snack.  After a few moments, I realized that it was quiet in the dining room.  Homeboy was eating the apple - like taking bites of the apple - not choking, not being ridiculous - just eating the apple like it is not big deal.  He now insists on eating grapes the "big boy way" (the whole entire grape!).  Sure Buddy, anything to give your Momma anxiety. 

Playdough - Samuel is finally a fan of playing playdough!  Wootwoot!  I love playing playdough.

Bubbles - Samuel has been a fan of bubbles for quite awhile, but he has finally figured out how to ask for them.  He had bubble baths at MamaG's house and thought they were the best.  He asked for a bubble bath every single time I went to the bathroom (and at 8 months pregnant, you can guess how many times a day that is).  He also wants to play bubbles in the sink (see muffin story above).

I feel like I am especially sappy these days (until I am not - ha! then it is, "I have the Holy Spirit dwelling in me. I can be patient and self-controlled.") Samuel has moments of such sweetness and it is so hard for me to think about having an infant and our whole dynamic changing.  We are thrilled to welcome Brother, but it is hard to think about Samuel's whole world changing.  Overall, I think it is a good thing.  I feel like we have come so far.  I used to tell tiny baby Samuel, "Samuel and Mom are a team.  We have to work together."  I mainly said this when he would cry and cry and I didn't know what to do.  The other day I realized, "We are!  We are a good team.  We do work together."  I know his moods, hand gestures, and preferences.  I would like to think that he knows when I am fun-Mom and when I am serious-Mom.  I enjoy spending time with my kid!  I don't feel like all day every day is "grit your teeth and get through this".  I have a pretty good idea when to let the rules slide a bit and when to stand firm.  He is my sidekick and I am his (truthfully he has Mom and Bunny as sidekicks).  We hang out together all day, every day for the most part.  I have had a lot of small moments in the last month that I have felt proud of Samuel and how far we have come.

On a somewhat different parenting note, I told myself before I became a parent that I did not want to lie to my kids.  And it is getting hard.  I am not sure why people feel like they can lie to toddlers, probably because it is easy.  The main times that it is challenging are food and TV.  I so often want to say, "I don't have any yums" instead of, "we aren't having anymore muffins today."  Or "the tv/ computer/ whatever is broke" instead of "we aren't watching any trucks right now".  

And last but not least - the finger drama!  We have tried to raise Samuel to be "tough" aka not dramatic about little bumps and falls.  When he was learning how to sit up, crawl, walk etc. he would fall so many times a day.  We did our best not to react.  Consequently Samuel has had some pretty big tumbles and not really been too emotional about them (knock on wood).  A few weeks ago, he picked at one of his nails and it turned into a painful situation.  I tried to solve the problem by putting a bandaid on his finger (his first ever bandaid).  He cried for like five minutes and would not calm down.  It was a trying few hours. He held his thumb out and babied it and was dramatic about it (he wouldn't let me put his coat over that hand etc.) Thankfully bedtime came and the next day he seemed fine for the most part.  


Fast forward a few days and we are trying to pack up quietly at our AirBnB while everyone is exhausted and hasn't had any food or coffee.  Samuel started going through a toiletry bag and found a bandaid.  To entertain him and appease him I put it on his pointer finger.  Lordhavemercy!  He was so dramatic about it.  I took the bandaid off an hour later because I couldn't take it.  He was throwing a fit and non-consolingly crying like it was his thumb all over again.  We kept telling him, "It is not really hurt.  You are okay!"  I could not believe how dramatic he was being... and nothing was wrong.  Since then, he has brought up his finger "owie" about every other day.  It slays me because there was nothing wrong with it!  

Happy 22 months Samuel Cary!  We love you!  Here's to soaking up your last month as an only child.  Love, Dada and Momma

Samuel Cary - 21 months

"Uh-oh"

Our Samuel is 21 months old (on the 21st!).  Life with Samuel is challenging and fun - sometimes all in the same moment.  We had a really full month!

Accomplishments:

A few more words - Samuel has started saying, "uh-oh" (it doesn't sound exactly like uh-oh, but it is pretty close).  He says, "um!" for food he likes (or food he wants). He also makes a "mmmmmm" sound for cows and "art, art!" for a dog barking (it sounds NOTHING like a dog barking but that is what he is communicating).  He is still "vrooming!" all day every day.

Imaginative Play - Just in the last week or two Samuel has gotten so much better at playing imaginatively.  He will act out stories happening with his toys.  The story lines are very short.  And then we repeat the same story 10 times in a row, but it is better than it was.  His favorite stories right now are about farming.  He likes to drive the tractor in the barn, have the tractor take a nap (for three seconds), and then wake up.  He also likes to feed his animals and give them drinks of water.

He likes to wear his farming hat while playing farm

Attention span - I also feel like his attention span has leaped into longer time frames.  He will sit and play or read for much longer (10 minutes maybe?) than he used to.  A year ago at this time, I was going crazy trying to entertain him all day.  He would go through and "play" with all of his toys (or pull all the books off the shelf) in 15 minutes.  And then we still had 9 hours and 45 minutes left in our day.  There are days now when he will only play with one basket of toys.  He has been slightly better about looking at one book in the car for a whole 5 minutes instead of tossing it aside after 30 seconds.

Watching TV independently - Glory, glory, hallelujah! Samuel is getting better at watching TV by himself.  Typically he likes to sit on my lap to watch TV, but every so often he will sit and watch it for 10 minutes and I can get the dishes done without being interrupted 800 times.  

Being silly with Dada

Braver around Dogs - I am not sure if this is something that has happened this month or last month, but Samuel is doing so much better around dogs.  I completely understand why dogs are overwhelming and potentially scary to Samuel as they are the same size roughly.  On several different occasions, Samuel has done great around dogs.  He likes to throw their toys for them and feed them 500 treats.  (Now Mom just needs to relax when Samuel is around dogs...)

Likes:

The Wheels on the Bus, Father Abraham - Since we can only sing, "The Wise Man Built His House Upon the Rock" so many times a day, we sing other songs to Samuel.  Every other week or so, he decides he likes one and then he wants that song on repeat for days.  He also likes, "This Little Light of Mine" and "Jesus Loves the Little Children".  Samuel especially likes it when Bunny does the hand motions for the songs.

Funny Story - we would sit and sing around the table after supper while visiting MamaG and PapaG.  Samuel loved it.  If someone would sing and not do the hand motions, he would call them out.  It cracks us up that he is so opinionated about so many (seemingly small) things.

Making Waffles with Dada on Christmas Morning

Coloring with Big Boy Markers - I have been hoping that Samuel would take a liking to coloring as it is good for his fine motor skills (and it involves sitting still).  He is mature in his choice of coloring utensils.  He won't color with crayons.  He prefers markers, pens, or pencils.  Of course this means that I have to sit with him when he colors, but it is okay. He gets tickled when I draw a tractor or cow.  And he recognizes what the pictures are so that boosts my self-esteem.

Christmas lights - Samuel really liked seeing Christmas lights (which he calls, "Jesus") when we would ride in the car at night.  He would get annoyed that there were not continuous lights to see.

Christmas gifts - Our boy got so spoiled over Christmas.  He got so many trucks or tractors that by the end of Christmas, if he saw a wrapped package, he would say, "Vroom!  Varoom!"  Christmas was definitely more fun this year with Samuel than last year.

Walking "fast" - Samuel likes to walk fast and do laps.  He made up a sign for "fast" and he especially likes to walk fast when other people participate.  He is getting pretty close to running (just in time as Momma is big these days).  I remember so many people cautioned us, "You don't want him to walk, he will be running three days later."  Maybe that the experience for some people, but I love that Samuel can walk.  It has been six months since he started walking and it has been great!

Reading Cars and Trucks and Things that Go with Grandpa

His Own Coffee Mug - Last Sunday someone at church (Jill) gave us the cutest little coffee mug.  Samuel has been thrilled to drink out his own coffee cup in the morning like Mom and Dad.  He has also been pouring the water out or putting his food in the cup, so he rarely keeps it the entire meal.  It has been good practice for him to drink out of a regular cup.

Looking at pictures of himself on phones - Lord have mercy!  I am not a big technology / screen person when it comes to my kid.  I would rather have them never watch TV or be on technology than to teach them moderation.  However, I think moderation is a better choice (although not easy).  My mom let Samuel look at pictures of himself on her phone while they were here over Christmas and now he is obsessed.  It is so hard for me as a parent.  Anytime Samuel sees a phone, he wants to see pictures of himself.  It has made it so hard to get pictures of him as he is always reaching for my phone now.  But moderation it is, so I indulge him once or twice a day and we look at pictures of Samuel.  He, of course (of course!), is opinionated about which pictures we look at (pictures of Samuel and Dada are his preference).

Still likes:

Muffins, cereal bars, Richard Scarry's Cars and Trucks and Things that Go, "driving" aka sitting in the driver's seat and steering, baths, bubbles, cracking eggs, stirring, helping cook, playing in water, all of Mom's and Dad's attention, truck videos on youtube, being outside, testing limits (not in the calculus sense), alternating between kissing Brother and blowing him raspberries, climbing on anything and everything, tape and stickers

Still dislikes:
Being told, "No", sitting in his own seat for meals, not having his paci all day, sitting in the car seat, not being allowed to drink coffee, playing by himself

Proud Moments:
The other night we went out to eat.  I grabbed one of Samuel's new favorite books from Christmas and a car for the diaper bag before we left.  Samuel did so well!  Samuel typically has a hard time being patient (the kid has ants in his pants - which is probably developmentally appropriate) when we go out to eat.  It felt like it took forever to get our food, but Samuel did such a good job looking at his book and playing with his car.  He did a great job eating food once it came.  No meltdowns (even though it was getting close to bedtime).  

Reading with Dada at the restaurant

On our way out of the restaurant, the (old) couple sitting next us mentioned that is had a pleasure to eat near us.  I think I replied, "You caught us on a good day!" which is 100% the truth.  But at the same time, I was proud.  It was one of the first times that all of the hard work of the last 21 months actually felt like it paid off.  The hours of gritted teeth, training, correcting, loving, and digging deeper for patience resulted in good behavior for the hour or so that we were in the restaurant.  Don't get me wrong - Samuel has plenty of good moments - they are not usually all in a row for 60 minutes though.  And when I spend pretty much all day, every day with him, I experience all of his high and low moments. I, of course, expect my kid to be well behaved 24/7 (because expectations seem to be my biggest enemy in life).  It gave me hope that we are doing okay as parents and that some day going out to eat will be normal part of life again.

We participated in the Chamber's Chili Cook-off again this year.  Samuel tagged along for the first hour or so (until nap time).  As people filtered in, he recognized (and greeted) everyone that came from church.  A year ago, I left him screaming with Jane Nice while we did the cook-off.  This year, he screamed when Dave and Jane left the cook-off.  It was so fun to have him know "his people" and not to be overly shy.  

Samuel got his haircut this month (his hair grows so fast) and he did great!  He sat in the chair all by himself and did not scream once.  He has "talked" (in sign language) about getting his hair cut so many times since then.  He was really mad that the next time we went to Meijer he could not get his hair cut again.  I was really proud of him for not freaking out (like he has done in the past).

All of Samuel's driving dreams come true at PapaG and MamaG's house

Family Time:
Samuel got to spend time with Grandpa, Grandma, Uncle Jared, PapaG, and MamaG this month!  He had a blast with my parents and brother when they came out for Christmas.  I don't think he had one tantrum the entire time they were here.  He always had someone catering to his needs.  

We had fun with Ian's parents too, but Samuel had his first tummy bug (that struck in the middle of the night but was short lived thankfully) and then he caught a brutal cold.  So he had fun but it was a bit subdued. One of the advantages of this age is that Samuel is easily amused - being able to "drive" MamaG's car, going down the big slide by himself, throwing sticks off the porch - all fun things that don't take much effort.

I will end this with a Dada quote, "Samuel has had more opinions in his 21 months of life than I have had in 34 years of life."  - I eventually told him that he had to stop saying it as it was discouraging me.  But it may be true - he is his mother's child.

Happy 21 Months Samuel Cary!  We love you, Momma and Dada

Baby #2 - 24 weeks

Nerd out with me for a moment.  24 x 7 = 168 days pregnant 168/30 = 5.6 months.  So we are well on our way to be SIX months pregnant.  Wah! 

My due date keeps changing - let's say this is 20 weeks.

Some days this pregnancy feels like it is flying by and other days it feels like I have been pregnant forever.  The closer my due date gets, the more anxious I get about this kid sleeping.  Those first 6-12 months of Samuel's life were rough in the sleep department (and I feel like lack of sleep makes both Samuel and I cranky and that affects all of life?).  The other night Ian said something about, "... and we will have a cute little cuddly baby.." and I was like, "I am excited for the baby to be a year old" (and Ian agreed).  At least we can go into it with our eyes wide open and know that it doesn't last forever (it just feels that way when you are in the middle of it).

Headed out to push the jogging stroller - it was COLD - a few days past 20 weeks

I have hit the wall as far as exercise goes.  I am OVER it.  I am not very good about getting out with Samuel as it is so rainy or cold or windy (or all three).  And by the time that Samuel goes to bed, I just want to sit on the couch and stare at the wall (or my phone).  I know my future self will thank me if I don't get totally out of shape - those last few weeks of pregnancy will be much smoother if I just keep at it.  I have found some pregnancy workout videos on Amazon Prime so I do about 10 minutes of something (and complain most of the time that I am doing it - sorry Husband).

21 weeks 21 days - He is face up - you can see his eyes and nose and mouth - Hi Baby Hi!!

I think part of the issue is that I am gaining weight slower this time around (thank you Lord).  I am 16ish pounds gained from my pre-pregnancy weight (which is closer to 25 or 27 lbs pre-Samuel but whatever).  With Samuel, if I did not exercise, I felt like I blinked and gained 5 pounds.  This time, I am eating whatever I want and not really gaining too fast (which is FUN and BAD all at the same time - eek!)

Baby's Profile, you can see his skull/brain, eyes, nose, and mouth

I also get a good chuckle out the differences in doctors.  With Samuel, I was weighed every.single.appointment (and I think I was lectured every single appointment about my over-achieverment in the weight gain department).  This go around I think I have been weighed three times and no one ever says anything about my weight gain.  


I have been craving food more this go around.  I saw a picture online of someone making egg noddles from duck eggs and I was like, "OH MY GOSH, I NEED THOSE IN MY LIFE RIGHT NOW!" It feels a bit immature, but I am rolling with it - for better or worse.  

21 weeks and 5 days

I think we have a name!  We have had one that we have liked for awhile and we have stuck with it for a month or two.  I may do a baby name poll towards the end of the pregnancy so we aren't sharing for now.  But it is exciting to think of the baby by his name.  

Sleep could be better (and it could be worse).  If I was exercising more, I may be sleeping better.  I am already sick of sleeping on my side.  I was awake during the night last night and I was thinking how grateful I am that I get to stay in my nice warm cozy bed.  My first choice is to sleep all night, but if I am going to wake up, it is nice to stay in bed and not drag myself out of bed to feed and change a person who does not like having his diaper removed due to being cold.  I think I have some more sanctifying to come in life.  

Maybe not my best picture, but some day I will be glad I took it - 23 weeks and some change

My back has started to ache some days so I am trying to be good about squatting to lift Samuel (which helps a lot!).  It feels inconvenient, but it is worth it.  And it is like a mini-workout, right?

24 weeks with Samuel

It is fun to go back and read what pregnancy and life were like pre-Samuel.  Man, I can remember making copies for my Calc BC final, like 45 minutes before I gave it.  It was such a stressful year.  I am glad that I am not re-living that year of my life :) It was a good hard year and I learned a lot, but I am thankful it is behind me and I am not in the middle of it.

And reading that blog post made me realize that I have yet to start a registry - do we even need anything?  I will probably make a couple (so that I can get the free stuff that you get when you start a registry). I need to get back in the infant / little baby mindset.  You forget what it is like (or at least I do, until I see a picture or video of Samuel and then it comes flooding back).

Samuel Cary - 19 months

Our Samuel Cary is 19 months - and wow! what a great month it has been!  Some people told us when Samuel was a tiny infant that somewhere around 15-18 months kids get to be really fun.  At the time, that seemed eons away, but now that we are living the dream, they were right - this is a fun stage.  I told Ian the other day, "I laugh multiple times a day with Samuel.  I also want to pull my hair out multiples a day, but I will take it."  I don't remember laughing much Samuel's first year of life and so I will take the fun with the challenges.

New Skills:
Praying - Samuel has been praying by holding our hands since the summer. Recently he wants to pray by folding his hands.  It is so cute.  

Samuel likes to shut himself (slowly) into a room (usually a closet) and then giggle until you come open the door.  He especially gets a kick out of it if you ask, "Where is Samuel?" while he shuts the door and is inside.  It is like the beginning phases of hide-and-go-seek. He does a great job of not smashing his fingers in the door.


We have been working with Samuel on the skill of picking up and cleaning up.  He does a pretty good job of picking up if you tell him specific task to do (go put this car in the basket etc.) It does depend on his mood, but that is probably every thing at this stage. He has self-assigned himself to help fold laundry (wad up a towel or shirt and shove it in a drawer).  I try to praise him for having a helpful attitude and then refold the item when he isn't looking.

Climbing up on the couch - ugh!  Samuel is tall enough and strong enough to pull himself up on the couch.  It is a good workout for him.  He was very proud of himself the first time that he made it up on the couch and went running across the cushions, only to fall and bang his nose on the arm of the couch.  Oh man!  He hasn't screamed like that in awhile.  I thought there was going to be a lot of blood, but there was not any.  His nose swelled up and he has a scab on his nose, but no worse the wear. I was probably just as upset as he was.  He also figured out how to climb the step stool (and gave me a heart attack when I found him standing on the top step).

Likes:
Hummus - praise the Lord - Samuel will eat broccoli, carrots, and peas dipped in hummus.  He isn't too fond of them on their own, but will eat just about anything (lunch meat, tortilla) if you dip it in hummus for him.  Sometimes he suggests somewhat odd combinations.  He also likes guacamole (but won't eat avocado). 

Truck Tunes - Lord have mercy!  This is completely my fault.  I was having a "just leave Mom alone for five minutes so that I can get one thing done" moment so I looked up "construction trucks" or something on YouTube.  I found truck tunes and now Samuel asks for the truck video all the time.  He wants to wear shirts that have trucks on them.  He wants to read trucks books (but that comes in a dull second place compared to the truck video).  

Coffee Maker / Coffee Pot - once again, this was kinda my fault.  We got a new coffeepot and I let Samuel help me take it out the box and with that, it was over. He staked the coffee maker as his.  He has taken the coffeepot everywhere with him - in the car, in the bathtub.  I think we may have made 800 cups of hypothetical coffee.  Samuel knew all the steps to making coffee - pour the water in, scoop in grounds, press the buttons on the front, pour the coffee in a to-go cup and add creamer.  He dragged that coffeepot all through the house and would insist on you taking the cup of coffee when offered.  Of course he wanted me to sit with him and watch the process. Someday my child will play independently...right?

Balloons - someone at church passed along some balloons from a baby shower to us - and they have been a huge hit.  Samuel will say, "ba ba" and try to lay on the balloons.  He laughs when they float up the ceiling. 

Cooking / Stirring - as the theme of the month goes - this was my own fault - I let him help me stir some eggs for an eggbake and now he begs to stir things.  He will often have a meltdown during cooking.  He gets mad that the eggbake has to go in the oven.  He gets mad that he can't touch the hot oven.  It is usually towards the end of the day so neither of us is filled with patience.  We get eggs for free (thank you Darla!) and so sometimes I will let him crack one or two eggs (which he enjoys and is really pretty good at cracking them) and whisk them around in the bowl.  He likes to run the show and tell me what needs to be added.   

Checking out a new (long) stick

Vacuum - he has liked the vacuum for awhile, but we have been vacuuming a lot this past month due to leaves be brought in the house all the time.  He likes to take the attachments off and pretend to vacuum.  He likes to pull the cord out.  

Outside - this hasn't changed much, but Samuel loves to go outside.  I don't even take toys out for the most part.  He will play with sticks, rocks, leaves, and dried grass. 

The best of times: When he laughs, when he spontaneously tells you that he loves you, when he does something completely unexpected and hilarious, when he prays

The worst of times: irrational meltdowns or all meltdowns / tantrums, when he can't tell you what he wants, when he wants to be held allll the time

Sleep: On the positive side - Samuel does not really cry anymore when he is in his crib.  On the negative side - I can't get him on a good schedule. We spent all of last month transitioning down to one nap and it was rough.  We were finally on a good schedule and he was napping for two or two and half glorious hours in the afternoon. Daylight Savings Time threw us off (over two weeks ago!) and I can't get him adjusted.  He is back to napping for 60-90 minutes (along with waking up at 5am) and then being ready for bed by 4:30-5pm and it makes the afternoons and evenings trying.  I think he has dark circles under his eyes.  Poor guy.  Hopefully we will get back on a good schedule after we get done traveling for Thanksgiving.

I told Samuel I needed one picture of him in his Halloween costume.

Speaking of holidays - we had some holidays to celebrate this past month - Halloween and pre-Christmas.  We went trick-or-treating to four different houses of church members and Samuel made out like a bandit!  He would wear his Samasourus costume until he got the candy and then would take it off.  It was a fun night.

We also attended a Halloween parade on the town square and Samuel loved the band.  It was cold, so we didn't stick around for too long.

Paulding's Historical Museum had a festival of trees in mid-November and we had fun checking it out.  Samuel definitely understands more of Christmas this year, but I still think we have a year or two until he really "gets" it. 

At the Festival of Trees - our serious Sam

Pregnog

I want to be a low maintenance person.  It annoys me when I am a high maintenance person.  If you are high maintenance, that is okay.  You do you.  

I pride myself on being able to eat pretty much anything.  I will eat food out the fridge cold. I will eat food that does not really taste good to me.  I will eat a lot of things.

The same holds true for beverages.  I prefer water and coffee (with cream).  I am not a big soda person - the carbonation upsets my stomach.  I drink a lot of water every day - especially when I was running and/or teaching every day.  In  Korea my co-teachers affectionately called me "Camel" because I would carry my Nalgene water bottle everywhere with me and drink so much water.  (Funny True Story: one of my co-teachers said, "I saw you crossing the street the other day.  I wasn't sure if it was you or not (it was winter and I was probably bundled up) but then I saw your water bottle and knew it was you."  hahaha!) 

Throw back to Korea - when I carried my water bottle pretty much everywhere with me

All of that to say, it has been a big disappointment (and thorn in my side) that water has not tasted good to me this pregnancy.  At first I chalked it up to "first trimester nothing tastes good".  But my distaste for water has persisted. I have been craving the water from the Upper300s Hallway at Mountain Vista - that may be the best water I have ever drank in my entire life. So I came up with a drink that does taste good (most days).  Ian calls it Pregnog (like eggnog?).  Samuel knows the steps to making Pregnog and will sit on the counter and help me stir it up.  He likes to drink it too but has a hilarious reaction to it every.single.time.

This is my Bubba.  Ian has refilled it countless times. #amazinghusband

Pregnog

1. Start with an empty 48 oz "Bubba" waterbottle.
2. Pour in an entire can of La Croix (I like the coconut flavor)
3. Empty a tray of ice cubes
4. Fill the rest of Bubba with cold water
5. Give a generous squirt of flavored Stevia drops.
6. Mix together using the straw.
Enjoy!

Bubba and me back in my "Math Cabin" days

I only drink one Pregnog a day.  I make myself drink water the rest of the time.  I look forward to my Pregnog every afternoon.  I sometimes drink about two-thirds of Bubba and then refill the rest with water. Sometimes it tastes good and sometimes it tastes gross.  If we had an automatic ice maker, I would probably drink a lot more ice water but I am lazy about making ice (and cracking it out of the trays).  I have some really hard first world white girl problems.

Baby #2 - 16 weeks

I am writing this slightly after the fact, so if it sounds vague that would be why.  

Week 13 - We had just gotten back from Presbytery and I think it took me the whole week to recover.  I would go from feeling okay to having a big wave of nausea hit and have to lay down.  I did my best to take it easy.  I can remember vividly that week 13 was not the best with Samuel's pregnancy but I was so tired of not feeling well that I was discouraged.

13 Weeks 3 days - don't mind the dirty mirror, it will get cleaned (foreshadowing :) )

Week 14 - I must have been feeling better at this point because it was the weekend of the Flat Rock Creek Festival in Pauling and we spent a good amount of time out there.  And I ate a good amount of ridiculous fair food.  The weather was a bit cooler which was a big relief.  We had another doctor's appointment this week.  Once again, no ultrasound, no trying to find the heartbeat etc.  I was really really hoping that there was a baby in there as I get a sense of relief each time I hear the baby's heartbeat on the doppler.

Week 15 - I was feeling okay, but I was a little disappointed that I did not feel awesome!  I remember with Samuel's pregnancy that I felt SO MUCH better by week 15.  However, we found out that we were having another BOY this week so who cares how I felt.  We FINALLY had ultrasound during week 15.  They moved my due date up a few days and we got see our little cutie.  I was 65/35 going in that we were having a boy (Ian wanted a girl, but thought it was a boy).  When we first out that we were expecting, I was hoping for a girl and then within a few weeks, I switched and hoped for a boy - so I was thrilled.  Ian says that he hopes for a girl somewhere along the way.  I said, "Don't talk to me" (I was too close to the morning / all day sickness experience to even think about child #3 Lord willing).

15 weeks 1 day - I think I was headed to Cross Country practice

I also ran for 5 minutes during week 15 so that was exciting.  I was committed to exercising last go around, but this time I think I am more so.  It was so hard to get back in shape after Samuel (some of that may have been due to his rough delivery).  I keep saying, "Your body will thank you in 9 months."

During our doctor's appointment I found out that I had a bacterial overgrowth which led to antibiotic cream.  I was not very mature about this. But it is now a distant memory so Praise the Lord for that.

Week 16 - I finally finally finally felt like myself again (hallelujah!) I had a fire under my bottom and I wanted to get stuff done.  I could stay awake and cross stuff off my to-do list during Samuel's naps.  I had energy and desire to exercise.  I rarely had any nausea.  Life felt good again.  Thankfully this go around I am gaining weight at much slower rate.  I weigh more now than I did at this point during the last pregnancy, but in some ways, I really don't care.  I am so thankful for this little life that I will try to be laid back and let my body do what it is going to do.

16 weeks 4 days - we went for a run (well walk / run ) outside

16 Weeks with Samuel 

Baby #2 - 12 weeks

I have been wanting to sit down and record some thoughts from this pregnancy, but I haven't yet.  My memory is so bad that if I don't write stuff down, I will forget.  Or everything will be hazy.  (Case in point: Ian is referring to August and September 2018 as "the lost months" ha!)

Week 5 - the best week of pregnancy thus far.  We found out towards the end of the week that I was pregnant.  I felt so good that I didn't think I was pregnant.  Ian thought I was.  So I took a pregnancy test to have a definite answer and I was wrong.  The only two clues that I can remember prior to knowing that I was pregnant were: 1.) About a week before, I found myself at 10pm craving a roast beef sandwich.  Like I could not sleep if I did not make this sandwich.  As I was sitting there eating my roast beef sandwich at 10pm I thought,"This is what a pregnant woman would do." And then I mentally shrugged at the thought, finished my sandwich, and went to bed.  2.) I had just started fitting back into some of my pre-Samuel clothes.  One pair of shorts seemed to fit fine in the morning and by afternoon they felt tight.  I thought, "Well that is weird, my belly used to get bigger as the day went on when I was pregnant." I shrugged it off as needing to eat less.

Week 6 - I struggled through a few days of cross country camp and was absolutely exhausted.  I napped every time that Samuel did.  Ian had VBS each evening so that was not so fun.  We told our parents and siblings shortly after we found out.  Ian's Mommabomma had the best reaction.  All I said over the phone was, "We have some exciting news to share..." and she was screaming.  

Week 7 - We were on vacation with Ian's parents and brother in Door County, Wisconsin.  I spent a lot of time resting and feeling nausea. I would feel yucky but then if I ate, I would feel better.  Going on vacation during the first trimester is the best and worst! It was SO GREAT to have Ian and his parents around to help with Samuel, but at the same time, I felt like I only experienced a tiny piece of Door County due to laying in bed most days.

Our family of FOUR in Door County.  I felt horrible when we took this picture, but I knew it would be on social media, so I tried to look not sick.

Week 8 and 9 - oh man!  These were the worst.  I felt awful all day and either laid on the couch or the bed.  Samuel would bring me book and after book to look at. He would whine to go outside a lot which I felt bad about it.  But it was also mid August so it was hot and humid out.  We were in deep survival mode - using paper plates, eating frozen pizza, and not caring about too much. My personal hygiene was at an all time low and I did not even care.  We had some rough weeks.

Samuel was a trooper.  He would come and stand next to me when I would throw up.  He wouldn't try to play in the toilet (which I am pretty sure would be his dream come true).  He was patient for a 16 month old.

We had our first doctor's appointment during this time, it was a let down.  They did not do an ultrasound, they did not try to find a heartbeat, they pretty much told me not to do drugs and come back in a month.

I remember thinking a lot about Samuel's delivery during this time.  Mainly I kept trying to imagine what would have happened if we had not lived in a time of modern medicine.  For some reason I was fixated on thinking, "what if..." and I was somewhat emotional.  I think this was a byproduct of not laying around too much (good for me physically, not necessarily the best for me mentally).

Week 10 - I think we started telling people around this point because it was too hard to tell people that I was still sick after so many weeks.  I don't think I threw up at all, but I did not feel great either.  I tried to convince Samuel to watch TV with me, he wasn't into it much.  Everyday from 4pm until whenever Ian got home we would watch Daniel Tiger Neighborhood.  By this point, poor Samuel had stop asking to go outside - which was great and heartbreaking.  He would go outside with Dad so that made me feel a bit better.

Our cookie from Susie's Bakery that announced Baby #2 to our Facebook family and friends

Week 11 - the smell of coffee no longer turned my stomach but the taste of it was yuck! {I just read this sentence while proofreading and chuckled because you can tell I deal with a toddler all day every day} I started to get some energy back but it was slow going most days.  My goal was to not leave the house at all ever.  I tried to wear regular clothes but by the afternoon I had running shorts on.

Somewhere in week 10 or 11 Ian and Samuel both caught the same cold.  It was gross - running nose, fever, and a headache.  Both Ian and I were out for the count and Samuel was seemingly fine.  He was running circles around us. I had a hard time having a good attitude by this point because I so tired of being sick and tired. I was so so so thankful that I did not catch the cold.

10 Weeks 6 days pregnant and I remember that I felt HUGE.  I thought everyone could tell I was pregnant just by seeing my belly.  

Week 12 - Hopefully only a few more weeks of feeling bad to go? I definitely was feeling better than week 8 or 9 but I still had to lay down every time Samuel napped.  I think I tried to go back to Cross Country around this time.  I pretty much would just stand or sit and watch the kids.