Christmas 2019

I told Ian earlier today, "This may be the best Christmas of our lives!" and it feels so true.  There were so many good memories that I wanted to capture from today.  (And just in case you are wondering - the Best Christmas Ever was the very first Christmas when God the Son took on flesh - nothing can top that)

I think the reason that this Christmas has seemed so great is that Samuel is old enough to "get it" yet he has no expectations.  It results in a lot of joy.

Leading up to Christmas, people would ask Samuel, "What do you want from Santa?" and he would just stare at them blankly.  This blessed my heart so much! My husband grew up not really believing in Santa and that has been something we have wanted to pass onto our kids. So we talk about Santa but we don't do much more than that.  Samuel also has a speech delay that sometimes impedes his communication - I am sure this played a part as well. At some point Samuel will have a whole list of things that he would like from "Santa" but to have a seemingly content two and a half year old is amazing.  

This morning when we told the boys that it was Christmas, Samuel's first reaction was to run to the other room to see the nativity scene.  My mom wrapped up each piece of the nativity to correspond with The Donkey in the Living Room when they were here over Thanksgiving.  We have been unwrapping a piece each day and trying to talk about the different parts of the Christmas story (that means - Samuel likes to unwrap the piece and then has a 5 second attention span for any reading I try to do).  Total Mom fail - I thought he would be more interested in the presents under the tree that I did not have the next piece out.

Henry hung out in Baby Jail (a toy that holds him in one spot) and Samuel opened presents.  We decided to do Read, Wear, Want gifts this year.  I am sure we will do something different each year.  Henry got some special sock / slippers that weren't supposed to come off.  (Spoiler alert: he had them pulled off in less than a minute).  I didn't wrap Henry's gift as he doesn't really understand.  And if he can see Mom or Dad, he is happy.  

Samuel got a firetruck, the Jesus Storybook Bible, and waterproof mittens from Mom and Dad.  He got a gazillion other gifts from friends and relatives (and he hasn't even gotten some of the grandparent gifts yet).  He was thrilled with his toy firetruck and carried it all over with him.  He did a great job (for a two and half year old) of taking turns with Mom and Dad for opening gifts.  As far as I know, Samuel thought that today was just any other day and then instead, Dad got to stay home and there were presents to open.  There was no countdown to Christmas Day, no "I can't sleep because tomorrow is Christmas", no "waking Mom and Dad up at 5:30 because it is Christmas and I just can't sleep" (Hank covered the wake Mom and Dad up several times during the night thing - his second front tooth on the top is sooooo close to popping through that he was up a few times).

We had waffles for breakfast and Samuel did a lot of good pretend play with his fire truck.  Henry did a lot of peekaboo and "Praise the Lord" (what we say when he puts both arms above his head).  Two happy boys.

While Henry napped, we went outside and enjoyed the gorgeous weather.  Once he woke up, Brent came by with a gazillion gifts!  Oh my goodness - Mr. Potato Head, a police car toy, the Very Hungry Caterpillar game, Bible Word books, kitchen play cooking sets, and soooo much more.

Once he left, we tried to get lunch and kiddos down for naps.  We had a gourmet lunch of "eat whatever you want" (I had a bowl of cereal and Ian had leftover pork).  We try to do some conversation questions at meal times so that we can practice good conversation and not focus so much on what different people are deciding to eat or not eat (the Internet claims that this is supposed to help). Ian asked, "What was your favorite gift from today?"  Samuel (completely unprompted) replied, "Gigi" which is how he says Jesus.  (Did I mention that today has been the best Christmas of our lives!?!)  Such a great answer!  And such a great encouragement that some of the stuff we say does sink in.  We then sang (along with our beloved Alexa) Happy Birthday to Jesus.  And Samuel kept requesting to sing it again (the love of repetition is strong in this one).

The boys (all three of them) are waking up from naps now and we are headed over to hang out with some friends from church.  What a blessing today has been! Merry Christmas!

Thankfuls 2019

Every year on Thanksgiving, I make a go of recording 100 things I am thankful for. It is a fun tradition started by my Mom during a long car ride to visit relatives when I was kid.  The past few months have held a tension of my exhaling, "Thank you Lord for Your kindness to me in xyz way" but also hearing the whispers of, "Why Lord?  Why aren't you kind to me in the way you are kind to her/ him/ them?"  So let's drown out those whispers with some gratitude. (and if you don't have time to list 100 things the best way I have found to drown out the whisper to say, "Even if the only thing God ever does for me is save me, I will be thankful to Him forever.")

100 Things I am thankful for (aka God's Kindness to Me)
1. God - is there anywhere else to start?  Creator, Sustainer, Emmanuel
2. Salvation - where would we be left on our own?
3. Ian - his patience and kindness towards me can be humbling
4. Samuel Cary - I had no idea how much I had to learn from a two year old or how much fun a two year old can be
          4.5 Samuel's laughter and joy
5. Henry Joseph - you are here!
          5.5 Henry Joseph's Smile
6. my family's health
7. God does not give up on me
8. God's continual patience with me
9. our church family - they are so generous to us and take good care of us, if something comes up, someone in our church family is our first call (and by call, I really mean, text)
10. God has taken such good care of us and provided for us in miraculous ways - all I have needed, Thy hand hath provided
11. those who have journeyed ahead of me in mothering and pass along rich insight 
12. those who have journeyed ahead of me in mothering and pass along timely encouragement
13. Instagram
14. snow plows
15. snow plow drivers
16. our extended families - they come see us and that is the best
17. when the boys nap at the same time
18. when both boys sleep all night
19. BSF and specifically my BSF leader and group
20. board games
21. winning board games (should I write that and put it on the internet?)
22. our cozy little Cottage - so, so, SO much better than our 1 bed room apartment that we brought Samuel home to OR that "cozy" little apartment next to the Korean Air Force Base that we lived in our first year of marriage
        22.5 our basement and attic
23. Hadley Rose and The Donkey (our cars)
24. God's continual work to sanctify me and transform / recreate me into being more Christ-like
25. Samuel is talking more and more
26. restaurants / take out for when you don't feel like cooking 
        26.5 frozen pizza
        26.75 frozen salmon from Costco
27. crock pot / instant pot
28. video monitors
29. when the weather is nice enough to play outside with the kids
30. Seeds Family Worship songs
       30.5 watching Samuel sing and do the hand motions for More than Conquerors or Colossians 1:16-17
31. HOT DECAF COFFEE
31. cream
32. stevia
33. other EPC pastors' wives
34. our coffee mug collection and all the sweet, sweet memories they represent
35. digital pictures and digital videos
36. the Bible
37. La Croix
38. ginger + honey + lemon in hot water
39. kombucha
40. RUNNING
       40.5 the hope of running like I used to
41. hand me down clothes and toys for the boys
42. fall leaves and spring flowers
43. spellcheck
44. prayer
      44.5 prayers answered the way I want them answered (should I write that and put it on the internet?!?)
       44.75 prayers answered not the way I want them answered to remind me that God is sovereign
45. Bunny (Samuel's stuffed animal / lovey)
46. videos of my kids
47. pictures of my kids (and family)
48. how ridiculously excited Samuel gets about anything to do with Papa and Gaga
49. Samuel's church friends (he calls them Ba, Ga, Gee)
50. parks
51. splashpads
52. bath time
53. online banking
54. Amazon Prime
55. meijer
56. Samuel's imagination
57. Theresa A. Lindell
58. the dishwasher
59. the washer and dryer
60. the vacuum
61. furnace
62. central air
63. garage
64. space heaters
65. pay at the pump
66. drive through pharmacies
       66.5 drive through anything 
66. Costco
67. when Samuel is snuggly during story time
68. Bible time with Samuel
69. Henry's growls
70. when Samuel pretends to be a bear under the table after supper
71. when the boys wrestle
72. uninterrupted hot showers
73. rebel "ice cream" 
74. the yard covered in pristine snow
75. a field of wheat before winter
76. disposable diapers
77. our Wednesday night Mom's group
78. Alexa will play, "Lord, I need you" at volume 8 whenever I ask her to
             78.5  Alexa also plays Christmas music anytime of the year
79. when both boys are quiet in the jogging stroller or the backseat
80. coats that are made to be safe for the carseat
81. Susie
       81.5 Susie's Bakery
82. Sara (and her sweet fam!)
        82.5 Sara's Sweets
83. pumpkin bread
      83.5 pumpkin banana bread
      83.75 chocolate chip pumpkin banana bread
84. Redneck Disneyland
85. Christmas cards
86. datenight questions
87. dual control electric blankets
88. when I try a new recipe for supper and it tastes good
89. electricity
90. that I get to stay home with the boys
91. chickfila
92. when google has an answer to my parenting question (or any question)
93. how kind God is to remind me at pivotal moments that it is not about me
        93.5 and that's it is for His glory
94. sweet little Brody
95. Spotify
96. bluetooth speakers
97. how much Samuel loves his Unc Tttt
98. how easy it is to bring joy to the boys in this stage of mothering
      98.25 bubbles
      98.5 sidewalk chalk
      98.75 big boxes
99. God's faithfulness
100. fun traditions
101. Grandpa / Great Grandpa 

The birth of Henry Joseph

I am writing this way after Henry was born (sorry Buddy) but better late than never is my motto and hopefully in the scheme of Henry's whole life, 18 months isn't that long.

I am not really sure where to start and I am typing this one fingered but here it goes. After Samuel's birth, I was told there was a 70-80 percent chance that if I had another child, it would be by c section. Well sign me up then. Our original c section date was March 20 but that was a Wednesday during Lent so I asked if they could reschedule it. Thursday, March 21 at 7:30am was our appointment. I was thankful that both boys would be born on the 21st - it would be easy to remember.

I think we set our alarms for 4am. I had to shower using hypocleanse or something and put clean clothes on. Don't ask how closely I followed the pre-op instructions. I don't remember sleeping very well and I don't remember how I felt. Probably a mixture of nerves and excitement and unbelief. It is so weird to wake up and say, "let's go have a baby"

Ian''s dad prayed for us and we were off...to the gas station. I threw a hissy fit that we had to stop for gas. I thought it would make us late and I was flipping out. I eventually calmed down and we made it to the hospital on time. We parked and headed in.  I think we took a selfie in the entryway.  The main things I remember about check-in was that 1.) no one else was there and 2.) we received the devastating news that due to a local flu epidemic, visitors were being restricted.  I was so sad to find out that no one under the age of 18 would be allowed to visit.  We were able to name two visitors and we picked Ian's parents (of course).  

We jumped through the hoops and signed some paperwork and were taken back to a pre-op room.  It was small.  Ian changed into scrubs and I changed into a hospital gown.  We spent the next several hours waiting.  The nurse would come in every so often and do one or two things.  I think I had an IV and monitor hooked up pretty early on.  It was another one of those weird, "We are about to have a baby" moments but there wasn't anything to do.  I think Ian got a picture of Samuel enjoying his breakfast from Matt and Cathleen and that made me feel so much better!

We were getting close to our surgery time when we were informed that we were going to be pushed back a bit for an emergency c-section.  It sounded like a similar scenario to our birth with Samuel and I felt so bad for the person.  When Dr. Adebayo came in, I jokingly asked if we were his first birth that day and he replied, "I delivered a baby at 3:30 this morning." I am not sure what I replied because I was so shocked. I have thought about his comment so many times over the last 18 months.  It changed my perspective on doctors and grew my respect for them.  

I went into the operating room first and had my epidural started.  Except I don't think it was an epidural.  I remember shivering uncontrollably when I went in and I was so nervous as I knew I had to hold still but I was so cold that I couldn't stop shaking.  The anesthesiologist was a pretty serious fellow but somehow we ended up talking about Korea.  I think his son was living there at the time.   

(It has now been 21+ months since Henry was born and my memory is getting foggier - sorry Buddy!) I think after the anesthesia I laid down, they inserted the catheter. Ian was brought in at some point and then we were ready to go.

Ian sat up by my head.  My two main memories were: the surgery / getting the baby out seemed to take FOREVER.  With Samuel, I thought it was "bam!  Baby out!"  I also remember that it hurt so much more.  I could feel them tugging and pressure.  I don't know exactly how to describe it.  It wasn't painful like pushing or labor is painful but it was uncomfortable.  I can remember seeing spots often so I eventually just closed my eyes and tried to take deep breaths.

And then (after what felt like forever) he was here! They showed him to me briefly and took him over to get cleaned up, weighed, etc.  I don't remember Samuel crying that much when he was born.  Henry cried (and cried) the moment he came out and I don't think he settled down until I finally fed him in post op/ recovery.  

We were shocked that he was 8 pounds 7 oz just like Samuel and was a quarter of an inch taller and had a slightly smaller head.  It felt like it took a long time for them to stitch me back close.  Dr. Adebayo did make a kind comment to the nurse about, "how it is so much easier to do surgery on someone with a normal BMI".  I always feel like a whale those last few weeks so I appreciated his comment.  

Happy Birth Day to our Henry Joseph!  I could write a whole other blog post about post c section joys but I will save that for another day.  We love you Buddy and we are so glad you are here!

Samuel Cary - 22 months

What a fun month we have had!  Several people have mentioned, "It seems like he is so grown up" or "He is a little boy now".  I think I have kept waiting for a season of parenting to feel easy or that saying that life with Samuel has been fun implies that it is easy.  I don't know if there is a season of parenting that is easy.  BUT life with Samuel is fun (and sanctifying).  One month from today we start over - Samuel gets a brother.  I am such a sap when I think about it.  So here is a sappy look at our last month.

Accomplishments:
Dada went on a mission trip - We survived a week away from Dada.  I told Ian, "I feel so sorry for whomever stays with Samuel when we are in the hospital with the Baby."  Samuel asked about Dada about 800 times.  Since Ian flew out of Indianapolis, we were able to drive together to the airport, drop him off, and then drive just a few hours to MamaG's (and Samuel napped for an hour of the drive that I had solo!).

The last time we went to Ian's parents, Samuel and I had tummy bugs and then we all got colds.  This time we were healthy - Praise the Lord!  It helped the week to pass quickly as Samuel had new toys to play with, new libraries to explore, and MamaG to play with when she wasn't at work.

Samuel also asked about "Pa" (PapaG) about 800 times. I told him, "Dada and Papa are working together." So I think he now thinks that Ian and Matt work together all the time.  It was fun to get pictures of them and show the pictures to Samuel.  We spent a lot of time looking at pictures on Momma's phone during the week (but we watched no TV... moderation, right?).

Ian's flight got delayed on the way back by 3ish hours.  I decided to just drive all the way home by myself (we were already on the road when we found out about the delay).  Samuel did amazingly well... until the last hour.  Then we were both tired and the sun kept shining in his eyes (and there wasn't a way to block it).  But we made it.  It is fun when you can see growth in your kid.  He did so much (so much!) better in the car than our trip to IL for Thanksgiving.  

On the flip side (what is the opposite of an accomplishment?) we just got back from Presbytery and Lawdhavemercy - Samuel slept horribly.  He napped for 20 minutes and then slept from 7pm-12:30am and 4am-6:30am. So I may never let him sleep outside of his crib ever again.  I always think, "Oh he will get tired, he will sleep" - not my kid - the more tired he is, the worse he sleeps.  I look back and chuckle at my new mom self thinking, "Babies sleep when they are tired."  Nope.  They sleep when you put them on a rigid schedule and follow it.  I could say a lot more about Samuel and sleep, but who wants to hear about that?

Talk on the phone - Samuel has realized that he can "talk" on the phone to people.  He really only wants to talk to Dada and sometimes PapaG, but he asks everyday (sometimes multiple times a day) to call Dada (he puts his hand in a flat palm to his ear and tells me who to call). He likes to hold the phone up to his ear and walk around.  He usually doesn't say much.  I need to get him an old phone from the thrift store (it has been on my mental to do list for about 3 months).

Help make muffins - for Valentine's Day, I tried to think of some things that Samuel loves.  The list was: cracking eggs, stirring stuff in a bowl, blueberries, bubbles, muffins, and watching trucks - so we made blueberry muffins together and then I let him play in the bubbles from the dish soap while watching trucks drive by the kitchen window.  He did such a good job!  I told him to that we had to work together and stir gently.  All the ingredients stayed in the bowl for the most part and he did so well.  He did have a meltdown when the muffins came out of the oven and they were too hot to eat.  A few months ago, he would stir so violently that flour would fly out of the bowl and he was so bullheaded about how things needed to be done that he wouldn't listen.

2T jammies - Samuel is still wearing 18 month clothing but I moved him up to 2T jammies and they seem to fit better.  He has "vroom!  vroom!" jammies in size 2T so you can guess how Samuel feels about moving up in size. Once we finish our stash of size 5 diapers, he will be in size 6.  


Putting mittens on - Samuel has gotten so much better at putting his mittens on over the course of winter.  At the beginning of winter, he basically would shove his whole hand into the big part.  He now knows to put his thumb into the thumb part (sometimes he puts his pointer finger in with his thumb, but he will let me fix it).  He used to wear his mittens for 5 minutes and then take them off.  He wears them the whole time we are outside (or until he soaks them by picking up snow).

A few more sounds - Samuel has created a sound for a cat.  It sounds something like, "yumyum" but it is his "meow".  He saw a figurine of a Souix Indian this month and called it, "Jesus" so instead he learned "how-ow-ow" while tapping his hand over his mouth.  Probably not the most socially acceptable thing.  He has a sound for "owie!" (see dramatic finger story below).

Likes:

Big Boy Anything - At times, Ian or I will mention, "what a big boy bite!" or something along those lines.  Well it has either paid off or backfired.  Samuel is all about big boy anything now.  He has a Big Boy Diaper that he gets to wear at nightime (it is actually a pull up for like 5 year olds but it leaks less often than anything else)  It has Spiderman on it and Samuel is obsessed.  He wants to wear Big Boy diapers for naptime (or anytime really).  I now buy three different types of diapers (my pre-Mom self is rolling her eyes and my current Mom self is muttering, "choose your battles and move on").  There are normal Costco diapers, Big Boy Naptime Diapers (Pampers Sesame Street), and Bedtime Big Boy Diapers (Nitetime Spiderman).  I try to be careful about labeling anything as Big Boy as then Samuel wants to do it the Big Boy way from then on.  

The other day I asked Samuel to carry an apple to the table while I worked on making the rest of his snack.  After a few moments, I realized that it was quiet in the dining room.  Homeboy was eating the apple - like taking bites of the apple - not choking, not being ridiculous - just eating the apple like it is not big deal.  He now insists on eating grapes the "big boy way" (the whole entire grape!).  Sure Buddy, anything to give your Momma anxiety. 

Playdough - Samuel is finally a fan of playing playdough!  Wootwoot!  I love playing playdough.

Bubbles - Samuel has been a fan of bubbles for quite awhile, but he has finally figured out how to ask for them.  He had bubble baths at MamaG's house and thought they were the best.  He asked for a bubble bath every single time I went to the bathroom (and at 8 months pregnant, you can guess how many times a day that is).  He also wants to play bubbles in the sink (see muffin story above).

I feel like I am especially sappy these days (until I am not - ha! then it is, "I have the Holy Spirit dwelling in me. I can be patient and self-controlled.") Samuel has moments of such sweetness and it is so hard for me to think about having an infant and our whole dynamic changing.  We are thrilled to welcome Brother, but it is hard to think about Samuel's whole world changing.  Overall, I think it is a good thing.  I feel like we have come so far.  I used to tell tiny baby Samuel, "Samuel and Mom are a team.  We have to work together."  I mainly said this when he would cry and cry and I didn't know what to do.  The other day I realized, "We are!  We are a good team.  We do work together."  I know his moods, hand gestures, and preferences.  I would like to think that he knows when I am fun-Mom and when I am serious-Mom.  I enjoy spending time with my kid!  I don't feel like all day every day is "grit your teeth and get through this".  I have a pretty good idea when to let the rules slide a bit and when to stand firm.  He is my sidekick and I am his (truthfully he has Mom and Bunny as sidekicks).  We hang out together all day, every day for the most part.  I have had a lot of small moments in the last month that I have felt proud of Samuel and how far we have come.

On a somewhat different parenting note, I told myself before I became a parent that I did not want to lie to my kids.  And it is getting hard.  I am not sure why people feel like they can lie to toddlers, probably because it is easy.  The main times that it is challenging are food and TV.  I so often want to say, "I don't have any yums" instead of, "we aren't having anymore muffins today."  Or "the tv/ computer/ whatever is broke" instead of "we aren't watching any trucks right now".  

And last but not least - the finger drama!  We have tried to raise Samuel to be "tough" aka not dramatic about little bumps and falls.  When he was learning how to sit up, crawl, walk etc. he would fall so many times a day.  We did our best not to react.  Consequently Samuel has had some pretty big tumbles and not really been too emotional about them (knock on wood).  A few weeks ago, he picked at one of his nails and it turned into a painful situation.  I tried to solve the problem by putting a bandaid on his finger (his first ever bandaid).  He cried for like five minutes and would not calm down.  It was a trying few hours. He held his thumb out and babied it and was dramatic about it (he wouldn't let me put his coat over that hand etc.) Thankfully bedtime came and the next day he seemed fine for the most part.  


Fast forward a few days and we are trying to pack up quietly at our AirBnB while everyone is exhausted and hasn't had any food or coffee.  Samuel started going through a toiletry bag and found a bandaid.  To entertain him and appease him I put it on his pointer finger.  Lordhavemercy!  He was so dramatic about it.  I took the bandaid off an hour later because I couldn't take it.  He was throwing a fit and non-consolingly crying like it was his thumb all over again.  We kept telling him, "It is not really hurt.  You are okay!"  I could not believe how dramatic he was being... and nothing was wrong.  Since then, he has brought up his finger "owie" about every other day.  It slays me because there was nothing wrong with it!  

Happy 22 months Samuel Cary!  We love you!  Here's to soaking up your last month as an only child.  Love, Dada and Momma

Samuel Cary - 21 months

"Uh-oh"

Our Samuel is 21 months old (on the 21st!).  Life with Samuel is challenging and fun - sometimes all in the same moment.  We had a really full month!

Accomplishments:

A few more words - Samuel has started saying, "uh-oh" (it doesn't sound exactly like uh-oh, but it is pretty close).  He says, "um!" for food he likes (or food he wants). He also makes a "mmmmmm" sound for cows and "art, art!" for a dog barking (it sounds NOTHING like a dog barking but that is what he is communicating).  He is still "vrooming!" all day every day.

Imaginative Play - Just in the last week or two Samuel has gotten so much better at playing imaginatively.  He will act out stories happening with his toys.  The story lines are very short.  And then we repeat the same story 10 times in a row, but it is better than it was.  His favorite stories right now are about farming.  He likes to drive the tractor in the barn, have the tractor take a nap (for three seconds), and then wake up.  He also likes to feed his animals and give them drinks of water.

He likes to wear his farming hat while playing farm

Attention span - I also feel like his attention span has leaped into longer time frames.  He will sit and play or read for much longer (10 minutes maybe?) than he used to.  A year ago at this time, I was going crazy trying to entertain him all day.  He would go through and "play" with all of his toys (or pull all the books off the shelf) in 15 minutes.  And then we still had 9 hours and 45 minutes left in our day.  There are days now when he will only play with one basket of toys.  He has been slightly better about looking at one book in the car for a whole 5 minutes instead of tossing it aside after 30 seconds.

Watching TV independently - Glory, glory, hallelujah! Samuel is getting better at watching TV by himself.  Typically he likes to sit on my lap to watch TV, but every so often he will sit and watch it for 10 minutes and I can get the dishes done without being interrupted 800 times.  

Being silly with Dada

Braver around Dogs - I am not sure if this is something that has happened this month or last month, but Samuel is doing so much better around dogs.  I completely understand why dogs are overwhelming and potentially scary to Samuel as they are the same size roughly.  On several different occasions, Samuel has done great around dogs.  He likes to throw their toys for them and feed them 500 treats.  (Now Mom just needs to relax when Samuel is around dogs...)

Likes:

The Wheels on the Bus, Father Abraham - Since we can only sing, "The Wise Man Built His House Upon the Rock" so many times a day, we sing other songs to Samuel.  Every other week or so, he decides he likes one and then he wants that song on repeat for days.  He also likes, "This Little Light of Mine" and "Jesus Loves the Little Children".  Samuel especially likes it when Bunny does the hand motions for the songs.

Funny Story - we would sit and sing around the table after supper while visiting MamaG and PapaG.  Samuel loved it.  If someone would sing and not do the hand motions, he would call them out.  It cracks us up that he is so opinionated about so many (seemingly small) things.

Making Waffles with Dada on Christmas Morning

Coloring with Big Boy Markers - I have been hoping that Samuel would take a liking to coloring as it is good for his fine motor skills (and it involves sitting still).  He is mature in his choice of coloring utensils.  He won't color with crayons.  He prefers markers, pens, or pencils.  Of course this means that I have to sit with him when he colors, but it is okay. He gets tickled when I draw a tractor or cow.  And he recognizes what the pictures are so that boosts my self-esteem.

Christmas lights - Samuel really liked seeing Christmas lights (which he calls, "Jesus") when we would ride in the car at night.  He would get annoyed that there were not continuous lights to see.

Christmas gifts - Our boy got so spoiled over Christmas.  He got so many trucks or tractors that by the end of Christmas, if he saw a wrapped package, he would say, "Vroom!  Varoom!"  Christmas was definitely more fun this year with Samuel than last year.

Walking "fast" - Samuel likes to walk fast and do laps.  He made up a sign for "fast" and he especially likes to walk fast when other people participate.  He is getting pretty close to running (just in time as Momma is big these days).  I remember so many people cautioned us, "You don't want him to walk, he will be running three days later."  Maybe that the experience for some people, but I love that Samuel can walk.  It has been six months since he started walking and it has been great!

Reading Cars and Trucks and Things that Go with Grandpa

His Own Coffee Mug - Last Sunday someone at church (Jill) gave us the cutest little coffee mug.  Samuel has been thrilled to drink out his own coffee cup in the morning like Mom and Dad.  He has also been pouring the water out or putting his food in the cup, so he rarely keeps it the entire meal.  It has been good practice for him to drink out of a regular cup.

Looking at pictures of himself on phones - Lord have mercy!  I am not a big technology / screen person when it comes to my kid.  I would rather have them never watch TV or be on technology than to teach them moderation.  However, I think moderation is a better choice (although not easy).  My mom let Samuel look at pictures of himself on her phone while they were here over Christmas and now he is obsessed.  It is so hard for me as a parent.  Anytime Samuel sees a phone, he wants to see pictures of himself.  It has made it so hard to get pictures of him as he is always reaching for my phone now.  But moderation it is, so I indulge him once or twice a day and we look at pictures of Samuel.  He, of course (of course!), is opinionated about which pictures we look at (pictures of Samuel and Dada are his preference).

Still likes:

Muffins, cereal bars, Richard Scarry's Cars and Trucks and Things that Go, "driving" aka sitting in the driver's seat and steering, baths, bubbles, cracking eggs, stirring, helping cook, playing in water, all of Mom's and Dad's attention, truck videos on youtube, being outside, testing limits (not in the calculus sense), alternating between kissing Brother and blowing him raspberries, climbing on anything and everything, tape and stickers

Still dislikes:
Being told, "No", sitting in his own seat for meals, not having his paci all day, sitting in the car seat, not being allowed to drink coffee, playing by himself

Proud Moments:
The other night we went out to eat.  I grabbed one of Samuel's new favorite books from Christmas and a car for the diaper bag before we left.  Samuel did so well!  Samuel typically has a hard time being patient (the kid has ants in his pants - which is probably developmentally appropriate) when we go out to eat.  It felt like it took forever to get our food, but Samuel did such a good job looking at his book and playing with his car.  He did a great job eating food once it came.  No meltdowns (even though it was getting close to bedtime).  

Reading with Dada at the restaurant

On our way out of the restaurant, the (old) couple sitting next us mentioned that is had a pleasure to eat near us.  I think I replied, "You caught us on a good day!" which is 100% the truth.  But at the same time, I was proud.  It was one of the first times that all of the hard work of the last 21 months actually felt like it paid off.  The hours of gritted teeth, training, correcting, loving, and digging deeper for patience resulted in good behavior for the hour or so that we were in the restaurant.  Don't get me wrong - Samuel has plenty of good moments - they are not usually all in a row for 60 minutes though.  And when I spend pretty much all day, every day with him, I experience all of his high and low moments. I, of course, expect my kid to be well behaved 24/7 (because expectations seem to be my biggest enemy in life).  It gave me hope that we are doing okay as parents and that some day going out to eat will be normal part of life again.

We participated in the Chamber's Chili Cook-off again this year.  Samuel tagged along for the first hour or so (until nap time).  As people filtered in, he recognized (and greeted) everyone that came from church.  A year ago, I left him screaming with Jane Nice while we did the cook-off.  This year, he screamed when Dave and Jane left the cook-off.  It was so fun to have him know "his people" and not to be overly shy.  

Samuel got his haircut this month (his hair grows so fast) and he did great!  He sat in the chair all by himself and did not scream once.  He has "talked" (in sign language) about getting his hair cut so many times since then.  He was really mad that the next time we went to Meijer he could not get his hair cut again.  I was really proud of him for not freaking out (like he has done in the past).

All of Samuel's driving dreams come true at PapaG and MamaG's house

Family Time:
Samuel got to spend time with Grandpa, Grandma, Uncle Jared, PapaG, and MamaG this month!  He had a blast with my parents and brother when they came out for Christmas.  I don't think he had one tantrum the entire time they were here.  He always had someone catering to his needs.  

We had fun with Ian's parents too, but Samuel had his first tummy bug (that struck in the middle of the night but was short lived thankfully) and then he caught a brutal cold.  So he had fun but it was a bit subdued. One of the advantages of this age is that Samuel is easily amused - being able to "drive" MamaG's car, going down the big slide by himself, throwing sticks off the porch - all fun things that don't take much effort.

I will end this with a Dada quote, "Samuel has had more opinions in his 21 months of life than I have had in 34 years of life."  - I eventually told him that he had to stop saying it as it was discouraging me.  But it may be true - he is his mother's child.

Happy 21 Months Samuel Cary!  We love you, Momma and Dada